Let The Games Begin

My family is coming to town!!!! Yipee!!! Well, my brother, sister-in-law, niece and nephew that is. My parent's live up here. I haven't seen my brother and his family in over 2 years when I went to Texas to bury my ex-husband.

They are coming up for my youngest daughter's graduation party on Saturday. I am so excited to see them.

The kids are going to stay for a week or so then I will take them home (and do some antiquing while I'm on the road). I will probably take my granddaughter with me. I need to get out of Kansas, even if it's only for a couple of days. This godforsaken place will suck the life out of you. It's like living in the Twilight Zone.

I adore my family. I have always been a big family person, no matter where I was or what I was doing in my life I stayed in contact with aunts and uncles. Whenever we would travel, we had to go to East Texas and Louisiana to see my relatives. I am so very glad that I did this because now they are gone. I still have a couple of my Daddy's siblings left but everyone else is gone and I miss them terribly.

On the other hand you have families like my husband's. He is the oldest of 7 all of which live within 20 miles of each other except for one. They never talk, they never get together. He does talk to one of his brothers' every now and then and we stay up on each others lives. But if any of the others show up for the party on Saturday I will be very surprised..... shocked is more like it. When their mom passed away some years ago several of the sister's were all mournful because they had been feuding with her, they hadn't talked to her in months. I don't think that they have forgiven themselves to this day for that.

Well I got off track from my original thought. Let's all pray for my brother to have a safe trip up from Texas and a good time to be had by all.

Graduation Season

Everyone is graduated. My youngest daughter graduated from High School... and received her diploma. My granddaughter graduated from pre-kindergarten.

While their graduation ceremonies couldn't have been more different they were of equal importance.

The high school ceremony was filled with straight faces, seriousness and tears. Out of a class of 500 students, 19 were singled out over and over again for their academic achievement. The sports team members were singled out for, I guess being on the teams. There was no mention of community service, arts, journalism or other school involvement. But I guess in this day and age it is all about test scores and winning teams.

The pre-K ceremony on the other hand, was a joy. They entered to auditorium with their little caps and gowns on as well as plastic sunglasses singing "We Will Rock You." As they received their diploma, each child was allowed to say what they had learned in pre-K and why it was important to them. Their answers ranged from learning to tie their shoes to learning to read (my grandbaby).

They sang songs about us all being equal, like a rainbow, and heard from their peers about what to expect in Kindergarten.

Both nights of graduation filled me with great pride for these amazing girls. I also went through enough tissues to stuff a king-sized quilt.

Next year is my only nephew's graduation....

Why Can't I Be Tolerant & Patient?!?!?!?

I must have been absent the day the Supreme Being gave out the tolerant gene. I do fine with children and teens.... they don't know better. It is my job as an adult to be patient, tolerant, loving and kind to those under the age of 20. But when it comes to adults, forget about it, my level of tolerance is zero.

I think that I am a good person, I volunteer in my community. Not just a hour here and another there. I'm talking 20+ hours a week for over 15 years. I have raised good kids, one of which is one of those see the beauty in everyone people. I have a good marriage, love my pets and family. Take pride in my home, I vote and I think I contribute to society. But people get on my last nerve.

We went out to dinner the other night and I was facing a table with 3 adults. They chewed with food falling out of their mouths, they did not know how to hold their fork and knife to cut their food, elbows on the table, gesturing with the knife in their hands. They were well dressed and looked like they should have table manners but they were pigs. It was bad. These folks will never attend a formal dinner I can tell you that much.

When we attended my granddaughter's pre-kindergarten graduation the adults were making so much noise that you could not hear what the kids or teacher were saying through the microphone. I did ask those around us to shut the f**** up so that I could hear but the point is, they should have known better.

I have real issues with cell phone use in my space too. Movies, restaurants, Post Office. I was in K-Mart and heard an attorney talking to a client on his cell phone. This was not a conversation that needed to be held in a public place and he was talking as loud as if he were in his office with no one around.

This is a problem I have been working on for sometime but can't seem to make any progress on. People are getting ruder when in public which makes conquering this demon really tough.

I'm not don't hold back either, I approach people if their behaviour is really offensive and rude.

I will continue to work on this, I guess the first step is recognizing your problem... which I have done. I will continue to think positive, good thoughts and maybe one of these days I will be a new me.

Reality TV....The Loser Women of Orange County

I remember the good old days when reality TV consisted of Survivor and America's Most Wanted, it wasn't so bad. I enjoyed Survivor mainly because I would squint my eyes and envision myself laying under the palm trees reading a good book on whatever island they happened to be on. Of course I had plenty to eat, lots to drink and a nice tanned, muscular guy catering to my every whim.

In truth no reality television was the ultimate... ya see, I don't really like people all that much. I find the majority of folks to be rude, self-centered and out for themselves. These are traits that I abhor and they come out in force in reality TV.

I work from home so the radio is on more than the TV during the day, but the other day I was tired of listening to the crap about immigrants, the songs were on their 3rd go round, classical didn't suit me at the moment and I don't do sports radio at all so I flipped on the TV. A show came on "The Real Housewives of Orange County." A woman was picking her child up from "juvie", another just got diagnosed for the 5th time with melanoma, 1 chippie is "engaged" to a man named ... I don't remember but it sounded like something out of a bad western but she's out partying instead of home taking care of his kids from a previous marriage so he is breaking up with her and there are a couple of other women.

I ended up watching, more or less, a few episodes of this pathetic show and it went from bad to worse. I could not believe the waste, the excess, the mistreatment and negligence of the children. The one attempt at volunteering was actually self-serving. It was all so sad

I realize that this is mostly scripted, edited, cut and re-cut. But truth is still revealed and their truth is sad. It is my hope that these folks get a reality check and soon. Maybe a huge earthquake will come along and drop California off into the depths of the ocean.

These people are breeding a generation as self-centered and wasteful as themselves. I don't think that folks like this contribute anything of any significance to this society.

If we are going to continue with reality television we need to demand that it serve the greater good. America's Most Wanted does just that, they take criminals off the street which makes us all safer. But pampered, over spending women in a gated community does nothing but inflame my anger.... send their day spa asses to Dufar.

Teach Your Teenagers - A Personal Story

Something that we don't think about teaching our kids is how to interact with the police. This is information that we hope they will never need but the harsh realities of this world are that more and more kids are being arrested based on information that they unwillingly reveal during a routine traffic stop.

I recently found this out the hard way. I live in Lenexa, Kansas. Lenexa cops profile teen driver's. They will stop a teenager before they stop an adult. I know because I live on a very busy street and see blatant traffic violations on a daily basis. I have seen people get into fist fights in the middle of the road. I see unrestrained children standing in the car, passing school buses that are stopped and so much more. The residents try to get something done but we aren't successful and on the rare occassion that we do get cops out here they will stop the teens instead of the adults.

My child was stopped my the cops in January for a burned out license plate bulb. They searched her car, while he was searching her car he was asking her questions to which she was responding. She was arrested for possession of cigarette rolling papers. Her car was towed.

1) She could have refused the search

2) She did not have to talk to the officer nor respond to his questions in any way other than her name.

Our District Attorney's Office automatically refers these cases for diversion "this is not an admission of guilt" we will just throw your child into the juvenile justice system without a trial for the hell of it because it brings in lots of money for the county and the system. EXCUSE ME!!!

We have opted for a trial, I want the DA's office to prove why possession of something you can buy in any convenience store is illegal. I know people who have used Bible pages to roll joints so is possession of a Bible illegal?

Lenexa will arrest a minor for possession of tobacco products instead of writing a ticket. This is overkill. Do they not know how screwed up the Juvenile justice system is in this area? Do they care? I don't think so on either count. They are bullies in my eyes.

Less than 24 hours after her arrest she was once again stopped, the front tires of her car were on the white line at a stop light, not the pedestrian walkway, the white line way before it. Once again her car was searched but this time the officer let her call me on her cell phone, I sent my husband to where they had her stopped and they let her go.

So please talk to your driving teen about this... they do not have to allow a search without a warrant or probable cause and they do not have to answer any questions without you or an attorney present.

I have never trusted in the justice system or law enforcement but I have never passed this on to my kids. My daughter was in DARE which tries to make cops out to be your friends, this also places the kids at a disadvantage as they get older... that view will land you in jail.

We punished her over this issue, 1 month of grounding and she missed her spring break trip. Who knows when it will go to trial for the court to do their thing. I will keep you posted on the outcome.

I have to vent.... Lazy people suck

I sell antiques online. This requires that I spend several hours a week attending sales and auctions in order to maintain my inventory. For the most part I don't have any complaints about the way folks conduct their sales and their business. I know who has the best estate sales, who has fair prices, high quality antiques and collectibles, knows their antiques, etc. But this past Saturday I met the dregs of the estate sale lot.

The first sale we went to seemed a little odd... 5 complete dining room sets, very few items were priced and those items that were priced were HIGH. It just did not look like a true estate sale or atleast any that I had been to before. I went into the kitchen of this house and it was piled with boxes filled with holiday crap, not antique or vintage not even collectible, it was all cheap new stuff heaped and piled in boxes. I counted 23 boxes. You couldn't move in this room much less rummage around through the items to try and find anything to buy. In another room there was a MELTED plastic doll with no head with a $10.00 price on it. I did find a few items to buy... all not priced offered them $10.00 and left.

As we were walking to the car I overheard 2 gentlemen talking behind us about how the items in the sale didn't belong to the man who lived in the house. I turned and asked what he meant and he said that he knew the family the wife died several months prior and the man recently moved. The gentleman I was talking to had been in the home on numerous occassions and recognized very little that was offered for sale. Evidently the "company" conducting the sale just hauls stuff from sale to sale in hopes that they will eventually get rid of it. There is nothing wrong with this stuff is stuff, I don't care who it belongs to as long as it's okay for you to be selling it. ATLEAST HAVE THE COURTESY TO PRICE THE CRAP!!!!!! I think that this is the deal, they don't put prices on items because some neighborhoods may be able to bring in more than others and if you have priced something then you may be cheating yourself out of a quarter or two. I do know that I will not be going to anymore of these folks sales.

The next sale was amazing. It was a family run estate sale plus it was 1/2 price day. Everything was clean and neatly displayed. I found numerous items, visited with the ladies, all sisters, they told me the stories behind most of the items I purchased and we had a great time. I really found some treasures both to sell and to keep.

Here's the downer.......

The 3rd sale, turned into our last one. It was in a fairly well-to-do neighborhood and from the outside the house looked very nice. I found a few items on the front porch, all unpriced, but at that point I was okay with it... I started a pile by the "cashier". I entered the kitchen first. OH MY GOSH it was gross. Grease was on all of the dishes, nothing was pulled out of the cabinets or on display so I reached up into a cabinet and pulled out a plate and mouse turds fell out onto my head. I flipped the plate over and it was Wedgwood. It looked like there was service for 12. There was some antique ironstone dishes but I didn't touch them they were almost black with grease and grime.

I ventured on through into a den of sorts and noticed boxes filled with family pictures. There was a stunning portrait of a lady dressed to the nines. I started wheezing..... there was mold on the walls. I found a cookbook I was interested in and grabbed it and warily made my way to another room.

The living room had several broken boxes and figurines. I went into what looked like a childs room and all of the surfaces were covered in dirt and grime and there was mouse crap on the stuffed animals. The carpet was covered in trash throughout the house.

Mind you none of this stuff had a price tag so you didn't know what they wanted for this dirty stuff and you weren't really sure what disease you were going to catch simply by touching it but I have found some great buys in worse places so I trudged on into the final room.

This room had a sign "all books in this room $2.00", cool I'll look at the books. I love books, I love selling books and I collect vintage first edition books. By this time I was having a very hard time breathing because of the mold and mildew so I was moving quick. I spyed a print on the wall that I was interested in and found 8 books that I also wanted.

I hit the front door at a dead run straight to the cashier. I grabbed my pile and asked for prices.

She grabbed and I do mean GRABBED the books out of my hands, I told her that these were in the $2.00 book room. "We won't sell anything with an inscription in it." I'm stunned but okay with that. She hands me back 3 books. I ask for the price on the print.... $25.00, I tell her to keep it. And so it goes. They wanted retail +++++ prices for this dirty, infested, greasy, crap that they couldn't be bothered with pricing beforehand or even pulling out the items they didn't want to sell. I was angry I felt that we buyer's were there to clean up and bring out the "good stuff" so that they didn't have to ruin their lungs and health by going into that nasty house.

THE REST OF THE STORY.........

When I was in the den I noticed quite a few framed letters signed "The Eisenhower Brothers", the books that they would not sell to me were inscribed to Mrs. Eisenhower and there were numerous Dwight Eisenhower items in the house (there probably were not for sale either).

DD Eisenhower was from Kansas but I know it was not Mamie Eisenhower's house. So I did some research. President Eisenhower had several brother's all of whom left the area except for the eldest, Arthur. Arthur had a wife Louise, Lousie had a daughter from a previous marriage, Katherine that Arthur adopted. Katherine married Berton Reuche (sp?) (I did buy one of his books at this sale) and they had a son. So my deduction leads to me believe that it was the home of Katherine.

Then I start feeling sorry for her. I cannot find an obituary and the family tree I looked at doesn't show her as deceased so she is probably in a home. Where were these 3 people conducting the sale when she was living in the house? Why didn't they care as much for her "name" when she was living in squalor as the do now that they are "selling" her life and letting folks tromp through her filthy house? I would bet dollars to donuts that they books and other items of note that they would not let us buy they will try to sell on ebay thinking that they will bring big bucks. I am really upset with these folks that I don't know and will probably never see again as long as I live for allowing this person to be shown to the world through the filth in this house, they could have plugged in the vacuum cleaner and taken a couple of swipes. No wonder they were sitting on the front porch.

I do believe in Karma and I know that what you put out there come back to you 3 fold. I don't want to be anywhere near these 3 ladies when their Karma catches up with them for this instance.

Shame on you and God bless you Ms. Eisenhower where ever you are.

Family Reunion Part II

The family reunion was good. We are picking ticks off of ourselves but that is okay. It was way out in the country.... and I do mean out in the country. I loved it for that in itself. It was so quite and full of fun places to explore with my grandaughter and puppy.

The house is an early 1900's farmhouse, nothing fancy but fabulous. The kids couldn't get over the fact that both bathrooms were upstairs. Actually my hubby mentioned this a few times too and it is his side of the family. His uncle passed away a couple of years ago and his aunt is getting ready to put the house on the market to sell and she wanted to have one last family get-together before she moves.

Oh how I wish I could get my brood to move out in the boonies. I have fantasized about this since we got home. I have placed my garden, painted the rooms, arranged my antique furniture and even looked into how many chickens and goats I can put on 4 1/2 acres of land. It would be so nice and comforting to be away from the noise of the speedway that runs beside my house day and night. I would be so happy out there.

Aunt N. said that her neighbor is a real pain in the ass. So I would put up a privacy fence on that side of the yard to block her view of my nirvana. Or atleast plant some fast growing shrubs along the shared fence line. But after the hell I am living in now in the suburbs a nasty neighbor would be a piece of cake.... actually I can be pretty nasty when pushed. I have out nastied quite a few folks when it came right down to it.

This is just my little pipe dream for now. Maybe in a few years when retirement gets here I can go to the country for some peace and quite. Reality sucks sometimes.

Family Reunions

I am going to a family reunion tomorrow, it is my husband's fathers side of the family. This is a bunch of really nice folks that I haven't seen in quite a few years... I didn't make it to the last funeral on that side of the family.

Both of my girls and their significant others are going with us as is my grandaughter and we have to take the puppy. He has already chewed one hole through the side of his kennel and escaped but I couldn't leave him locked up in it all day anyway. My step-daughter is on maneveurs in California in preperation for going to Iraqu so she won't be going with us.

I made my usual dish "Better Than Potato Salad", it uses rice and several other wonderful ingredients and it's always a hit. I will have to post the recipe.

My husband is oldest of 7 children, and of the 7 only 2 were invited to the reunion. The other's probably wouldn't have come anyway but I don't understand why the invitation wasn't extended to them. I found this out when I called one of his sister's to see if she wanted to ride with us. I told her that the invitation probably got lost in the mail of they may have sent it to her old address.... even though she has been in her house for about 5 years.

It should be a fun day. Lot's of good food, laughter, catching up with people I haven't talked to in way too long and need to do a better job of staying in touch, and they are going to have an egg hunt for the children (my grandaughter is excited about that). They also live out in the country so there will be some great photographic opportunities.

Nope, I don't think that it will be a bad day. Hey it could be worse, it oculd be the other side of the family!!!!!

For Everything There Is A Season - High School Graduation

My baby is graduating from high school, what a bitter sweet time this is.

I hope that her father and I have prepared her for the world that awaits. Children don't come with instructions so we can only do the best that we know how. We teach them right from wrong (some of us do), manners (again some do), how to be good citizens in the community and the world.

I have been parenting since I was 17 years old and I am very pleased with the young woman and amazing mother that my oldest daughter has grown in to. I know that I was not the best parent, especially the first 7 years of her life but she was always my first priority.

What I hope my daughter has learned:

• You have to volunteer in your community.
• Don't be quick to trust
• Be kind
• Recycle and care for the earth
• Take time for yourself, no matter how hectic you think that life is
• Go to the dentist every 6 months. ( We spent a fortune on braces)
• Don't drink and drive..... don't drink period
• Never become dependant on a man, learn a skill, the man may leave but knowledge stays with you forever
• Don't have babies until you have been to atleast 6 different states or overseas
• Smile a lot, laugh even more
• Enjoy your children when they are small, the dust bunnies and dirty dishes will always wait but the babies grow up
• Play in the rain, you will not catch a cold
• Adopt dogs from shelters not pet stores
• Learn to cook new dishes
• Don't take antibiotics unless you have a bacterial infection
• Listen to and follow your intuition
• You can always come home
• Mom will always listen
• Keep an open mind and be tolerant
• Vote
• Take a stand if you believe in something... even if you are just standing in line at McDonald's
• Have an opinion
• Never stop learning, be curious
• Work at what you love not just to earn a paycheck

Some of these may take sometime, especially the last, sometimes we have to work just for the paycheck in order to work at what we love doing and that's okay. As long as you have a passion.

I think that these are all tenets that we should all strive to live by.

We Adopted a New Puppy from the Shelter

Austrailan Shepard Mix Puppies

I think that I have truly lost my mind or bowed to teenage pressure. No, actually this is something that we had been thinking about for quite sometime, bringing a new dog into out home. The only criteria was that I had was that it must be a shelter dog. I would never consider buying a dog from a pet store as you really don't know where those precious ones come from and the prices are outrageous.

Our current dog, the one we have in addition to the new puppy, we bought from a family that breeds dogs. She is a black Cocker Spaniel named Dixie, the love of my life. Dixie will be 7 years old this summer. When we went to look at her we got to meet both of her parent's as well as her grandparent's. They were living out in the country and all of the puppies were in a large baby gated area in the living room of the house. The day we got there everyone was outside playing because the weather was nice. I felt very comfortable with the transaction and Dixie has turned out to be an amazing dog. I did my research in advance and have been very happy.

My previous dog was a Shih Tzu, Patches. She was a little lady and I thought that no one would ever be able to replace her in my heart. We had to put her to sleep because at the age of 14 she developed a brain tumor and began having severe seizures. We tried medication but it didn't work. The vet said that with her age there was probably nothing that would help her. We kept it up for about 3 months but when the seizures started occuring 4+ times a day I finally had to make the difficult decision to put her down, it broke my heart. I sat with her while they gave her the shot and morned for weeks. I vowed never to own another pet. This lasted about 6 months and then we got Dixie.

I had wanted a Cocker Spaniel but had heard about Cocker rage but in doing my research I found that this only occurs in a small percentage of Cocker Spaniels. I also read that you can sometimes tell if a Cocker is prone to it by looking at their eyes, if there is red in or around their eyes Cocker rage might be a problem. I don't know how much truth their is to this but I looked at all the puppies when we went to get Dixie and none of them had red eyes.

Back to the point of this story, our new puppy. I had planned on getting an older dog since they are harder for the shelters to adopt out and ther actually had a Shar Pei mix that I was interested in. But when we got there he was actually mixed with a Great Dane and was huge. They had several Great Pyrennes, too big, a Llasa Apso which I love but he was "food aggressive" and that scared me with my grandaughter. So we decided on the puppy. His name is Mickey, he is an Australian Shepard Wirehaired Terrier Mix so he should not get much more than 50 pounds. Their dispositions are great, they do herd but we can live with that.

The picture above is of his litter mates. I will keep you posted in Mickey's life and that of Dixie as she adjusts to having a new "baby" in the house.

What can one say about Kansas? I have lived here for 20 years and it is like living in the Twilight Zone.

I have lived all over the world in my 45 year, including the South (I am a native Texan and very proud of it). I have lived with different cultures and loved every minute of it. I was in middle school in small town Texas when the schools were integrated and did not have any problems... other than Vicki Sneed when she decided she didn't like me and pushed my skinny butt into the outside portion of the window air conditioner everyday for a whole school year. I have seen Thai Buddhas, Temples in Bali and grottos in Mexico City. I have seen poverty and wealth, I have dined with Princes and been aboard nuclear air craft carriers. But no life experience prepared me for living in Kansas.

• Kansas will deny you your Constitutional Rights without blinking an eye.
• The Jo. Co. Kansas Republican Party will not let you join if you are not a card carrying Pro Life Member.
• Kansas has a law that it is illegal for teens under age 16 to engage in any type of intimate contact yet now (2006 legislative session) will allow and fund a permission based Sex Ed class in the public schools... let's teach our kids about the sex they can't legally have and then report them if we see them getting too close.
• The school system is "underfunded" yet the Superintendent in our district makes over $1 million a year in salary and benefits.... my daughter a senior can barely read but hey this woman has made her money.
• They think that money will fix the school problem but they will not legalize gambling.
• The Attorney General has subpeonaed records from abortion clinics "to make sure that minors aren't getting abortions." To hell with privacy and legal rights.
• Our brilliant legislator's are now voting for concealed carry... back to the wild west days meets June and Ward Cleaver.
• We can't forget that in Kansas "we" don't believe in evolution. Evolution has been outlawed in Kansas. I have figured out why..... the folks that are in the majority stopped evolving 40 years ago.
• Kansas has made it unconstitutional for same sex marriage and common law marriages are no longer legal.... this is in the Kansas Constitution!!!!!

It is downright pathetic. I don't know what these folks are afraid of.

I can't say that it is because they are religious, they are what I call selective religious. The pick their verses and ignore the rest that the Bible has to say. Many of the "Christains" I have met here are Christian on Sunday only and mean as hell, rude and nasty the rest of the week. Kansas and this selective religion has turned me off of organized religion all together.... but I will save that for another day. It is a rather sad story too.

Do I have anything nice to say about Kansas? The change of seasons is nice. I met my husband of 20 years here and the Flint Hills are amazing.

You might ask if I do anything other than complain about this stuff. Well as a matter of fact I do. I vote, I write letters, I have testified before legislative committees for and/or against causes, I volunteer in my community and I try to make a difference each day. So there, I am not just sitting around complaining and not making an effort to change things.